Friday, March 2, 2012

Please see HR to claim your boxers

Oh, you know, just another one of those days where you go to the ladies room and there's a random pair of men's worn boxers in the hallway.

Our HR girl has dreamt of this day since she began a career in this industry...

"Ensuing Company-Wide Staff Email

To: Office Staff
From: Lisa

Subject: Found

A pair of men's Tommy Hilfiger boxer briefs was found near in the hallway near the elevator. Please see me to claim them.


It's the little things that make a day great.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Top 100 "challenged" books of 2000-2009 and why I've never done cocaine

The American Library Association publishes a list of the most banned/challenged books by decade.  (Side note: referring to a banned book as "challenged" is a bit like the Irish habit of referring to forty years of sectarian violence as "the Troubles," and World War II as "the emergency.")

I stumbled across the list during one of those Internet tangents that happen to the best of us.

Mary: I remember Go Ask Alice
Mary: Not a lot about the plot, but definitely remember that it was kind of "controversial" book and so we were all into it
me: there's a song by Jefferson Airplane called White Rabbit that came out in 1969
Mary: right
me: I was reading the lyrics, I think it's definitely where the title came from

Right.  So as long as I'm being all Captain Obvious-

-I'd like to point out that the only reason I read Go Ask Alice in the 7th grade was because it was banned, and that was reason enough for me.  In case you haven't read it, Go Ask Alice is the "diary" of a young girl who slowly becomes involved with drugs and eventually (spoiler alert) dies.  At one time, it was required reading in our public school.  It was banned, presumably because there is drug use, sex and rape.  Parents complained.    And I get wanting to protect your kids, but 1) I do not support banning books for any reason and 2) by the time we were in 7th grade, one of the hot topics was about how Eddie cheated on Meg with Nina and they went to third base, so unfortunately kids at that age are a little more aware than we'd like them to be, so throwing something like Go Ask Alice at them isn't exactly going to get the same reaction as when they found out about Santa Claus.  Granted, we were still using bases to talk about sexual acts, but hey, who doesn't?  

Anyway, Go Ask Alice is obviously much more of a warning against drugs than an advertisement, probably because, like another popular young adult book of our times, it was written by a Mormon With a Social Agenda.

Not that one.

There it is.  Stephanie Meyer, author of Twilight.  With Seth Green?

Which brings me to another ridiculous Young Adult series, Sweet Valley High.

I started reading SVH when I was something like 11 years old, and it featured all sorts of amazing story lines.  I mean, check out the mustache on this guy.  LOOK AT THE MUSTACHE:

The twins were kidnapped, solving murders and almost-raped at least 50 times through the series.  There was even an evil twin (triplet??) who shows up and tries to take over their lives.  (And yet, SVH has never made that banned books list.)  Anyway, in one of the books, deaf beauty Regina Marrow tries cocaine just once and dies due to an undetected heart murmur.  Dies on a couch, asking for stupid Elizabeth Wakefield who has eyes the color of the Pacific Ocean and all-American good looks.  Also, I think she had just become not-deaf like, the book before.

Yes.  Because she dies.

This book scared the crap out of me and hence I became the coke-free blogger I am today.  Thanks, Francine Pascal and your army of ghost writers.

So without further ado, I present the ALA's Most Challenged Books list of 2000-2009.  Use it as a check list.  (Particularly #34 and #35.)  I put a star next to the ones I've read so that you can compare, and also because I'm a show-off.